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    Discussion in 'The Leisure Lounge' started by Oilytrunk, Jul 30, 2018.

    1. Oilytrunk

      Oilytrunk Member

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      My husband's work as a Mechanical Engineer is consuming all of his time. Once at home, he still chooses to continue sketching his design ideas, as compared to spending his time with me and his children. Is this really normal in this line of work, or do I have to take the necessary steps to salvage his relationship with our family? Please help me understand. Thank you!
       
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    3. toastcharm

      toastcharm Member

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      If you feel that he does not have time for you, talk to him and let him know (in a nice way). Honesty, understanding and communication is important in every relationship.
       
    4. Oilytrunk

      Oilytrunk Member

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      Hey @toastcharm! Thank you for your advice. I actually opened up to him last night and he told me that he understands my concern. However, it was really tough for him to open up to me about his feelings or any challenges he is facing. I recommended for us to try Regain to have a professional help us develop our communication skills in a healthy way and also serve as a mediator. He is still thinking about it. But I think that he will be open to trying it.
       
    5. MSHOfficial

      MSHOfficial Well-Known Member

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      This is a serious problem with workers these days. Yes, mechanical engineering jobs do require an extensive work hour, but doing work when you are at home is a personal choice. If some one is that interested in engineering, I would value that but giving all your time to it and breaking up your work life balance, unuh not good.

      So you should tell your husband about the problem and suggest that if the manager is making him overwork, he should probably change his job. But if its his personal choice, and its just him that loves to work all the time, then you don’t have anything that you can do about it.

      All you can do at that point is try to explain to him how he is missing out on life while he is giving his family hours to his job. I am sure he will be compassionate about spending time with you. I have seen previously, people who chose to work even when they were home, got themselves sick. They get high blood pressure usually and if he is a workaholic then it would take some time and slowly you can get his family hours back.

      All the best
       
    6. GoodCat

      GoodCat Well-Known Member

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      Yes it's ok for us

      I Aerospace, Mechanical Engineering and I work 60-65 hours a week.
      I often work at home because I don’t have enough time.
      I don’t know about your husband, but I do it for good money, this is serious money that can be spent on really important goals for you.

      Think about it,
      What does his work give you two?
      What will you have if it will work less?

      If you consider that this is enough then you should discuss the balance of his life)
      My wife is also very dissatisfied with the fact that I work a lot, but her opinion changes dramatically to the opposite when we buy her a car or go to rest in a good place, she loves when I give her jewelry. If I do not work a lot from some of these things, she will have to forget). Unfortunately, in our life, nothing comes out just so that you have to make some efforts.
       

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